{"product_id":"hoatac-patch-2-pack","title":"HOATAC Patch (2 Pack)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHOATAC™ — Homeowners Association Tactical\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhen the HOA board has had enough of your bullshit, they call in HOATAC.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHOATAC is the \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003edynamic kinetic branch of HOA Enforcement\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, specializing in high-risk residential operations such as:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• Unauthorized lawn height\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• Suspiciously festive Christmas decorations\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• Trash cans left out past 0700\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• Unregistered basketball hoops\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• Aggressive barbecue smoke\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• Driveways containing the wrong color vehicle\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• And neighbors who think “guest parking” means \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ewhatever the hell they want\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOur highly trained operators are equipped with citation books, reflective vests, walkie-talkies, and an absolutely unreasonable amount of confidence.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMission:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Identify. Document. Complain.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRules of Engagement:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e See Article 7, Subsection 14, Paragraph C.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEscalation:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Written warning → fine → passive-aggressive Facebook post.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHOATAC™\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause your neighborhood deserves a tactical response to a blue trash can.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHOA Enforcement — We See. We Document. We ENFORCE.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"HOA Enforcement","offers":[{"title":"Coyote\/Tactical Tan","offer_id":49161632809211,"sku":null,"price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Green\/Yellow","offer_id":49161632841979,"sku":null,"price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Green\/Black","offer_id":49161632874747,"sku":null,"price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Tactical Blue\/Yellow","offer_id":49161632907515,"sku":null,"price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0688\/7073\/4075\/files\/A24CEA85-BA86-45E5-817B-457667973382.jpg?v=1786293753","url":"https:\/\/www.thehoaenforcement.com\/products\/hoatac-patch-2-pack","provider":"HOA Enforcement","version":"1.0","type":"link"}